What?

I am losing myself
Bit by bit piece by piece
Forgetting the day
Forgetting the month
Forgetting the year

Forgetting the whats.
I remember that I knew
But it is gone.

Then the hows.
My brain knew how to think
Hard things. Complicated things.
It knew how to learn new hard things.
Now? All gone.

Now are going the thats
I am startled to read things
I wrote. I knew things that
Now I can't remember I knew.
In spite of the evidence.
I can't recover how to know that.

The other day someone scared me.
In a quarter block I forgot.
I spent days triggered in PTSD
and didn't know why.
I didn't remember that
It happened.
Then days later I did.
How did I forget that?

I am trickling away.
I am trickling away.